Saddle up

Guess what I did today? Come on. Guess! Guess!

Started washing the kitchen cupboards but then got distracted by fly poop and ended up scrubbing the kitchen ceiling? Nope, that was yesterday. Enjoyed a visit from a cousin-in-law, I mean, friend whom I have recently discovered that I have a lot in common with, and took pictures of her adorable girls? Unfortunately, no. I'm hacking up a lung so we put that off until next week, bummer. Moved the little bean out of the sun room to her new room upstairs, but only got her dresser moved as far as the dining room? Well, let's see, that would have been three days ago, and still the dresser sits. Retrieved a rubber frog which my three year old attached to the ceiling? Honestly, yes, but that's another story. Put saddles on my chickens?

Say what?

Snake skin patterned fleece fabric which my mother, who is deathly afraid of snakes, purchased.

I swear, I tell no lie. But I do occasionally swear. And come to think of it, I never did pay my mom for that fabric.

CHICKEN SADDLES!!!

There, they say you learn something new every day, and now you have. You're welcome.

Guess who goes riding? Shall we do multiple choice this time?

I've been running in and out of the house all day, trying to get these saddles just right. Too big, too small, and the birds peck and pull them half-off until the saddles are just hanging off their tails. Ugh. It's cold out too, really cold. The dog is cold and gets so excited every time I run in or out of the house. She was that close to tripping me once on my way in with three eggs in my pocket. No, I will probably never learn. Lord knows the kind of mess that could have been. Thank you, Lord, for not allowing the dog to knock me completely over, when I had eggs in my pocket.

That dog weighs almost as much as I do.

I have to make these saddles myself because it's freaking cold out, so there's no time to wait for something wacky like this to come in the mail. AND, do you have any idea whatsoever what something like a "chicken saddle" costs? Honestly, do you? Ridiculous, I'll tell you that much.

So have you figured it out yet? Who goes riding?

THE ROOSTERS!!!

My five year old knows that much. "Mommy, Fritzy just mated with that hen." In his world, I think that's about on the same level as "A truck just drove past". YES people, that's right, the rooster goes riding, well, sort of...

Didn't you ever wonder how birds have sex?

The problem is... yes, there is a problem. I am not saddling up my hens just because I'm bored out of my mind, and have snake skin fleece slithering around the house begging to be cut up. The problem is, there are only ten hens, and two roosters. The roos have their favorites (imagine my husband's most evil laugh here), who end up being mated too often, and... are you still reading?

Would you like to ask yourself why you are still reading?

Anyway... the roosters stomp around on the hens backs causing some of the ladies to have bald patches. It can be a real problem if the hens end up with open sores. When chickens see blood, they go crazy. The more blood, the crazier, and in short time can kill another chicken that has a bloody wound. Baby chicks, especially, can be very cannibalistic.

There, you learned at least two new things today.



Fleece doesn't unravel (ravel?) so this is (should be) an easy, no-sew project. Cut two holes for the wings, and a slit at the bottom for the tail. Plug and play. Or something like that.

We're not to the point of sores (yet), but we're getting temperatures well below zero now. It's going to be getting colder before it gets warmer. Lots colder. I did my research, and these chickens of mine are hardy, cold-weather birds, but not if they have huge patches of naked skin. And anyway, who doesn't love a fleece jacket, when it's ten degrees below zero?



Want to learn something else new?

There is actually such a thing as a chicken diaper. But even I am not about to go there.