Dishwasher

I am a dishwasher.

I also have a dishwasher.

I usually have to rinse my dishes before and after the dishwasher does whatever it does with my dishes.

I also have someone who likes to help put dishes away on the floor.

I used to think spatulas were harmless toys. As you might recall, one was recently used as a weapon in our house.


Maybe a plate would be better?


Or not.


Emptying the machine that pretends to wash dishes is so much fun!


Also tons of fun, shaking the bottom rack until the rusty, corroded wheels that support the whole darn thing fall off, so that Mom has to put a custard cup upside down in just the right place in order to support it just enough that the water sprayer thingie can still spin,


...and bouncing up and down with such enthusiasm...


...that one cracks one's own head against the top rack, causing giant teardrops to roll off one's sweet baby cheeks.


That dishwasher is just absolutely no good at all.

Heirloom seeds

At the moment, I have about fifty things going through my head. Don't worry, I will only write about forty-nine of them. Maybe.

I'm eating a really amazing sandwich. I should have taken a picture of it. It's too late now and sorry, but I am not going to stop eating to grab my camera. Which reminds me I should start some alfalfa sprouts, so I can have an even better sandwich later this week... and sprouts might be fun to take photos of as well.

I really need to add butter croissants to my arsenal of home-baked bread products.

Someone left the light on in the coop, so I have to go back outside again. I have no one to blame but myself, but that's OK, I love my chickens.

I've had a whole week to calm down since my seed order arrived, but I just can't help myself. They're so beautiful, I keep picking them up and smiling while I listen to them roll around in their envelopes.


It's that time of year, people! The weather may be frightful, dreary and bleak, but my garden is already growing in my head.

Oh! And the color pictures on these things are half my problem, I think. I see them sitting on the counter across the room, where they're screaming at me, "Pick me up! Gaze upon my gorgeousness and fondle me!".

Seriously, it should be illegal to put pictures like this on a seed package.


I can't get a darn thing done with them in the house. Every time I put them away, they call to me and I have to get them out again just to be sure, ummm... I don't know.

They are awfully pretty though, don't you think?

Besides being pretty, trust me, these are very special seeds.

They came from Seed Savers Exchange which means they are all heirloom seeds. Not a hybrid to be found. That means I can save my own seed. Each seed package, in fact, comes with instructions for saving your own seed from the lovely things once they grow in your garden. Detailed instructions too, like what each will cross pollinate with, and how far apart those items must be grown.

Each one is a historic variety that was painstakingly saved by someone for years and years. Some were thought to be lost and later found.

Personally, I believe saving my own seed is not a trivial thing. Once Monsanto takes over the world (and the truth is, they will), it will be the little people who had the foresight to save their own seed that end up saving humankind from certain disaster. Monsanto is evil. Maybe I'll write more on that another day.

Anyway, right now I have hope. Tiny little balls of hope rolling around in brightly colored envelopes. They are full of potential, waiting to do the one thing they were created to do.

I can't wait to see them grow. I am so excited to see how these varieties do here in our neck of the woods prairie. I ordered some cool stuff, an extra-early tomato, kale hardy to -10F, onions that store like rocks, tiny extra-early melons, gorgeous eggplants and swiss chard that looks like my kids colored it.

I have a friend who also ordered from Seed Savers Exchange, and we are planning our own little seed exchange. Seed saving goes hand-in-hand with seed sharing, it builds community and empowers us, and frees us.

Monsanto can kiss mine.

You Capture - Color

The sunrise this morning.


A teething but fairly happy little bean chewing on her sippy cup.


The master creation of a five year old who just finger painted for the first time ever in his life. Do you see the humpback whale?


Go visit Beth to fill your day with lots more color.

Something big

This morning my three year old was building towers for his baby sister. She destroyed them, and then they laughed hysterically while she clapped and clapped. They entertained themselves like that for quite a long time. They were both loving it.

It was a rather big improvement, because of something big that happened yesterday.

You see, just yesterday I found him standing over her as she cried. I mean, really cried, with big fat teardrops rolling off her face. The incriminating evidence was the spatula in his hand.

My sister pointed out the fact that maybe he had learned from her son, who on another memorable occasion smacked that little bean in the face with a ladle.

I doubt it. My kid knew full well what he was doing. My guess would be that even with his punishment, he was likely still pleased with himself.

Perhaps I'm the one who needs to take a hint, and stop handing out kitchen utensils in my attempt to keep the baby busy.

Anyway...

When it was nearly lunchtime today, he blew into the kitchen. "Can I have some cewuweeee?" he sang, as he bounced up and down looking into the cupboard.

I'm thinking, "He's crazy, does he mean celery?". I cook with celery, but we almost never snack on it. Instead I said, "You think I have celery? There isn't any celery in there. That's pasta".

Now he is spinning in circles in the kitchen "Can I have some pasta? Can I have some mac and cheeeeeeese?".

I remind him, "You didn't like your macaroni and cheese yesterday, why do you want it now?"

He changes his tune again, "Can I have some hard mac and cheese?".

I ask for clarification, "You want dry pasta?".

But he's already running out of the room yelling, "MACARONI PENGUIN!".

It would definitely be something big if this kid ate his food. I bet it will be less than two years and his sister will be bigger than him, and God help him then when she is the one with the spatula in her hand.

My biggest boy is at preschool today, which has been a really wonderful something big in his life.

Preschool was running two hours late today because of a winter storm that lingered from the weekend, although it ended up to NOT be as big a something as it was supposed to have been.

AND if everything goes according to plan, and there aren't any surprise disasters to deal with, I should have something very big to write about soon. Well, not that big...


...but not that little either.

Peanut butter balls

Once in awhile we like to make something that is extra fun. Fun to make, and fun to eat! It's high protein and very calorie dense, perfect for my skinny kids.


I dare say they're at least much fun as play doh. We make them into balls, or squares, or snakes... or even frogs and cats. Then, we roll around in them roll them around. Finally, we eat them!

The last time we made them, we were snowed in the house and needed some entertainment.

We made them even more exciting. How is that possible?

With CHOCOLATE!


Was it rude of me to post that photo?

I'm terribly sorry.*

Don't lick your computer screen. Go make your own Peanut Butter Balls!

First, mix together 2 cups of peanut butter, 2 cups of powdered milk and one cup of honey. Second, roll into small balls (or penguins or whatever you want) and roll in crushed cornflakes (we use wheat germ). Third, add chocolate chips if you're feeling crazy and bored, like we were. Fourth, don't blame me if they make you fat, I did warn you!

*not really

Un-decorating the driveway

Upon arriving at our humble home, you will be greeted by our big dog.

She may not think you're cool.

I love her.

Just this winter, she has decided that she doesn't like to do her business in the snow. I have no idea why the snow is so different this year.

It means you will also be greeted by a row of big frozen turds lining our driveway.


They're fairly well spaced, and the row is almost straight.

Rather impressive!

But that lovely photo is deceiving. They're not just frozen turds. Oh no! They are frozen turds in waiting. Waiting patiently in line.

I took that photo earlier this week. Guess what? This morning their destiny arrived. They wait no longer!

Exactly how far do you think a snow blower can throw a frozen turd?

What about a whole row of them?

One by one they met their glorious destiny, and flew thirty feet through the air!

Scavenging sunflower seeds

What kind of person gathers dirty sunflower seeds off the highway and puts them in her used Cadillac?

Yesterday morning was the third time I have had my trunk full of sun seeds. I shoveled them off the highway, again. But this time I wondered what it said about me.

Please excuse me while I try to get my cat to stop eating a blanket.

Anyway, back to the sun seeds. I don't care. They were there, and I took them.

End of story. Well, not really.

The second time I rescued sun seeds, I couldn't find enough buckets. So I did what any chicken owner with a corn stove would reasonably do. I stole my husband's corn hauling buckets. I say they're his buckets because it is his job to haul corn. I only do that if I have to. I'm the mom. I have other things to do, although not necessarily better things. Things like cleaning squash off the kitchen ceiling.

What is with this cat?

Hoping the pile of seeds would still be where I saw it, and planning to pick more up the following morning... I informed my husband he would be unable to fill all of his buckets with corn, as is his evening ritual. Obviously, I needed to use them.

He was not amused.

He found me a different bucket, a bigger one. If I did not have the car that I do have, it would not have fit in the trunk.

I was pleased. This should work.

When I got to the magic sunflower seed spot on the highway, the BIG pile was gone. Bummer, but there was enough of the small pile remaining that it was worth stopping. So I shoveled seeds into my 5 gallon bucket, which I then poured into the BIG pail in my trunk. I did this three or four times. I had a lot of seeds in there.


Only after I got home did I realize I would have to lift that big thing out of my trunk.

I figured I might as well try, being as I am a farmer and can take care of myself. I have chickens, does that make me a rancher?

Seriously, this cat will not stop nibbling on this blanket. Does it mean she has some sort of vitamin deficiency... or simply dementia?

After first checking to be sure I had no eggs in my pocket, I managed to hoist a zillion sunflower seeds out of my trunk. There, the hard part is done right?

It wasn't the weight so much as the awkward size that was the problem.

I waddled like a duck half-way to the barn. Then I put it down so I could think. Guess what? It slid like a dream across the snow! I pulled that bucket the rest of the way to the barn, and reasonably fast too.

I left a very interesting track in the snow.

Very pleased with myself, standing just outside the barn, I realized there was another problem. The barn door wasn't open wide enough to fit the bucket through, and the barn door is frozen in place for most of the winter.

One of my roosters was growling and I felt like doing the same.

I made it this far so I tried sliding the door. Wow, if only my life was this easy every day. I moved it a little, and a little more, and just a bit more. All that was left was to swing the huge unwieldy bucket up onto the dog house.

Victory was mine!

Was it worth it?

I don't know.

What else would I do to entertain myself in the middle of January?

Right now, I have two things to do. The type of things that do not fall into the category of entertainment, but more like whatever cleaning squash from the ceiling would be categorized as. I must go vacuum the remaining sunflower seeds from my Cadillac trunk, and clean the cat puke off my bed.

I knew eating a blanket was a bad idea.